News Flash: Women Lie

In other news: Trees are wood.

Recently, every fucking news outlet put out the ridiculous story of a woman swimming 2100 miles in 25 days. The fact that no man can do this was the first thing that sent my bullshit detector to "critical." Even Michael Phelps, when not getting stoned, couldn't pull this off.

Nevermind that fact that she's 56 years old. Seriously, don't think about it. Picturing a 50-something in freezing cold water is a bad idea. A few days later, the truth came out. She didn't swim the entire distance, she only swam a small part of it and was perfectly ok with taking credit for swimming the whole fucking thing.

If there's anything I've learned, it's that women will take credit for anything that you allow them to, good idea or not. Swimming across the Atlantic sounds pretty fucking stupid to me, sort of like driving a tractor on the highway, using only my feet, while blindfolded. Just because you can do something (or simply take credit for it) doesn't make it a good idea.